People.. Again.. Are trying so hard to believe in what they want to. To see what they want to. To fit in where they supposed to. But sometimes they just don't ever think about those possibilities when they merely a human too.
People.. Yes.. Again. Hold onto memories which come for every second their lives could be. When life comes to the inevitably hard and being so cruel, they're just being too immature to face it.
I'm just too ashamed to declare that I'm clearly a part of that society. I always think that someone gets to be what they wanna be.. But every single part of that wishes merely being.. Wishes. Even we couldn't think straight of the fact that we'll be gone eventually. Being a piece of dust that not even worth to be kept. Dust hurts your eyes, and you need your eyes to see things that you'll believe in.
Couldn't it be any worse? Cause life goes too painful sometimes. Even my body couldn't bear with it. And heart being painfully aching. And I just can't handle it.
...
Karna faktanya 'dia' meninggalkanku. Karna faktanya semakin sedikit jejakku di hidup'nya'.
Aku hampir menyerah. Aku hampir menyerah bertahan.
Aku hampir menyerah untuk kembali mencoba mempertahankan sisa bahagia.
Aku hampir menyerah mempertahankan segala cinta yang kami bangun berdua.
Kenangan yang lama kembali muncul. Ketakutan akan kebencian atas kenangan lama kembali datang. Aku takut.
...
Saat itu, aku adalah wanita yang paling bahagia. Sejujurnya, saat pertama bertemu dengannya, aku sudah sangat bahagia. Memang ketika aku bertemu dengannya, aku dalam keadaan yang rapuh, kosong, tanpa ada pena yang mampu membubuhkan tulisan kepada kertas putih kehidupanku. Saat itu, aku masih berusia 19 tahun. Sendirian, dan aku belum merasa perlu untuk mencintai seseorang. Aku tau belum waktuku, belum masaku.
Aku melihat 'dia'.
'dia' tersenyum.
'dia' mengulurkan tangannya.
'dia' menyebutkan namanya.
Seketika aku melihat masa depan, dan jalan untuk keluar dari gelap.
(TBC-)
...
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